from Wil...
For North, Steph and all who are part of this community of caring and support: I’m increasingly aware of two issues/perceptions which seem relevant to a number of us. I’d like to share them.
First, North & Steph….we care, we call, we visit. I’m imagining that you might, at times, be overwhelmed and/or become quite tired and in need of more rest and space than you are getting. I wish that you DO NOT HESITATE to say: “not now”, “enough for today”, “thanks, but later; we’re too tired”, or even “go home, please.” That BOUNDARY between you and us is one we mutually dance. In case we violate it, I hope you’ll feel free to call it from your side.
Second, another BOUNDARY issue….North’s experience nudges (and perhaps pushes) us in this “community of caring and support”, to expand and clarify a tenuous and shifting BALANCE between feeling compassion, love, tenderness in offering our gifts of time, service, money, etc. and KNOWING CLEARLY who we are, and honestly perceiving our limits without guilt when we can’t do more (knowing many others are with us in offering their gifts of self), pacing
ourselves and realizing we’re in this for the long haul for North, Steph, and ourselves.
Lets keeping loving, serving, growing together as we expand and discover, (perhaps more than we’ve ever known), about the depths of community.
Thanks for your hearing. Wil Smith
posted by Joel Bishow @ 11:29 PM
2 comments
2 Comments:
Thank you Will, for your beautiful words and timely reminder of boundaries and balance - being honest with each other while cherising and nourishing ourselves... our own cup shall then overflow with a greater abundance of love and service that we may share with others. We cannot give from an empty cup.
What fills my body and soul is a daily ritual of prayer and meditation - quiet time alone, connecting with God and Spirit, ASKING my angels for any help I need, embracing the tears when they need to flow, exercise, good food & positive energy, laughter! time off for fun & rest, and connecting with my beautiful friends.
Peace, clarity and energy abound...and then, we can say, "Use me God. How may I be of service today?
Then be ready for all the blessings, miracles, syncronicities and happy surprises that show up!
Love,
Jenny
Will,
Thank you for your wisdom and guidance. This is a transformational experience for all that come in contact with us. We do not know the boundaries, the past is forgotten, and new way of relating is unfolding. There simply are no easy "how to steps" All I know is that I have to learn to speak up, trust and continue to learn to receive. I agree with you and also ask that others not exceed who they are by commoditizing support or just making generic visits. Show your true light. How you do is up to you. If it makes you happy, it will likly support my healing and our household needs. We need to make a schedule to facilitate this.
Most of the time, I simply want to just sit and rest. Having very low energy seems to be my core physical experience. Its both imposed by the surgery and by my desire to get ready for Chemo/Radiation in about 4 weeks. So Stef ends up carrying so much more. I think if we could figure out specific tasks (laundry, cooking, bookeeping, shopping, etc.) that people take turns at doing and were regular that would help. Thank God for my Mom being her. When she leaves our life will become a bigger challenge. So the idea of shifts around specific tasks inclusive of just sitting and reading with me or listening to music would be great.
Again, Will your sensitivity to the situation is right on. Now lets turn that awareness into sensitive action.
Much Love and Life,
North
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